Jara

Jara (pronounced 'Yara') was born on 15th April 2007 (or 2550, BE).
It was Songkran public holidays (Thai New Year) and we decided to go on a little holiday in Hua Hin (200km south of Bangkok). I had been to the doc the day before departure and been given all-clear to go on holiday. Oh boy, how things turned out differently!
To be honest, we did make the decision to go to Hua Hin as it has hospitals where staff is likely to speak some English (Hua Hin is a major tourist destination in Thailand, especially popular among the expat community of Bangkok) and we had rented a car, 'just-in-case'. Of course never bothered to actually check out any hospitals or take any baby stuff with us.

So on the 15th, we were (like one does on holiday) hanging out by the pool, having a nice cup of coffee and a cheese cake, played some games, read some books... a very relaxing holiday! In the late afternoon on Sunday eve , we were walking down the streets of Hua Hin when around 5.30 pm I suddenly realise I am wetting my pants ... Only, I can't really stop it and slowly it dawns to me that it is more than just wetting my pants.
I tell Thorsten we better get this checked in the hospital... hmm, what hospital should we go to?


Decided to go to the Marriott Hotel and ask where they would send tourists for emergencies (hoping to get one of the better hospitals in town recommended). They send us to the (only) private hospital in Hua Hin.

After arriving at the hospital, the doctor initially wanted to examine me in a full and bussy ER room... I kindly refused. After examination (in a seperate examination room) the doctor decided that, yes, it had started, but it could still take anything from 6 to 20 hours before the baby is born. So can we still make it to Bangkok then? Yes, if you leave now now.
At that time, I wasn't really having real contractions yet, just some back ache. So we drive to the hotel (which was actually another 20 km south of Hua Hin) to pack and go. But... on the way, I suddenly got very, very strong contractions, very close to each other. I remember watching the clock in the car and realizing the contractions weren't spaced out as they had told me they would be (more like every minute rather than every 20 minutes!). I told Thorsten to go straight back to that hospital, I was sure I wouldn't make it to Bangkok.

And indeed, upon arrival at the hospital again (about 1.5h later) it became quite clear I would never have made it to Bangkok as by the time it was 10.07 pm, Jara was born (4.5 h after my waters broke).

It surely was a bit of an adventure as with the language barrier you're never really sure how much the person has understood of what you say.
In Bangkok, we had to sign up for a 'birth package' where you choose how you want to deliver (natural birth, natural birth with pain relief, Ceasarian section, etc) and it is well known that the number of C-sections are exeptionally high (especially in private hospitals). Often the woman chooses for an elective C-section but equally often, the doctor decides to do a C-section and you're never sure whether it's medically appropriate or whether it's for the doctor's convenience (faster, more money).
So when we got to the hospital in Hua Hin, we made it very clear from the beginning that we did not want a C-section unless things were going wrong. I had a bit of a scare when the doctor was examining my belly and said 'hm, the baby is very big' (which is a classic in Bangkok to do C-section).

But there was no need for our worries, the doctor was very nice and gentle and did respect our wishes (and spoke English!).

Although the hospital staff was kind, there were still things that disturbed us a bit and made us feel uncomfortable. Thorsten, for example, was initally constantly being guided away from me, out of the room. Until he made it quite clear that he was going to be IN the room the whole time. In Thailand, though, childbirth is a 'women thing'. Thai men do not assist their women; it's the woman's mother or/and sister that accompany them during this time. For me of course, I was having none of it!

Unfortunately some of the staff didn't speak any English at all (and our Thai isn't very good either), which led to some misunderstandings. For example, when I asked if I could come and learn when they were going to wash and dress Jara, the nurse said very politely 'wait a moment please' and the next thing I know, she comes back with Jara all nicely washed and dressed...

In the hospital, Jara got a 'goody bag' with some nappies and... 2(!) tins of formula milk. That really shocked us. Especially since I learned that most hospitals in Thailand are "baby friendly hospitals (BHF)" where 90% of the women exclusively breastfeeds their baby in the hospital. To qualify for a BFH the hospital has to comply with 10 steps, which include informing the mothers about the breastfeeding benefits and management, show mothers how to breastfeed, give newborns NO other food or drink other than breastmilk unless medically indicated, encourage breastfeeding on demand, help mother breastfeeding within a half-hour of birth etc.
In Hua Hin however, that was not the case. I had to insist right after birth to put Jara at my breast, and still then they took her away for washing, measuring etc. , nobody showed me how to breastfeed Jara and the nurses wanted to give Jara formula milk (since it as a free goody) from day 1. Luckely Jara stayed in my room so we could watch over her.

All in all, it was a good experience, the staff was nice and it showed us that however good you are prepared and set up to have your baby, it may not go as planned...

Now, almost 2 weeks later, we slowly slowly start to figure things out on our own (missed the prenatal classes, didn't have a clue on how to wash a newborn by the time we got home, etc...).
And as a friend of us said: you come home with the baby and there's no manual that comes with it... you have to figure it out on your own.

So that's what we do and it's a great experience!